Things I Have Done In The Name Of Healing

  • Walked Labyrinths
  • Reiki
  • Massage
  • Psychotherapy
  • Journaling
  • Coloring
  • Collaging
  • Taking pictures
  • Hiking
  • Walking
  • Meditation
  • Aqua yoga
  • Working out
  • Writing poetry
  • Started a blog
  • Reading novels
  • Reading books on healing
  • Reading books about PTSD
  • Watching videos about PTSD
  • Acupuncture
  • Prayer
  • Traveling
  • Retreats
  • Meeting with my priest
  • Developing mutually supportive friendships
  • Identifying 3 things I’m grateful for each day
  • Groups
  • Identifying what makes me me
  • Mindfulness
  • Taking care of physical health
  • Finding empathetic and knowledgeable health care professionals
  • Reading blogs about healing
  • Pinterest

What have you done in the name of healing?

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Anxiety

I used to have huge anxiety about going to the super grocery store in our area. I love this grocery chain and would have a hard time deciding to move to an area without one of these grocery stores. But, somethingvabout this store used to give me great anxiety. Sometimes, I would go grocery shopping and not even be in the grocery store after an hour. And sometimes after an hour, I would still be in my car and decide to go home because the grocery shopping was just not going to happen that day. I’m really not sure what my problem was. Maybe because the store is so big. Maybe because I don’t know who is in the next aisle. Maybe because I can’t see the whole store. Maybe because I feel on display and invisible at the same time. I also went through other major social anxiety at the time, rarely leaving my home. Cancelling appointments. Avoiding people. As I healed, this anxiety pretty much fell away. My therapist and I were talking about how far I’ve come last week, and she mentioned that I ho to the grocery store with no problem li em these days. It is true. It’s been at least a year since I could not go in the grocery store. Then, this weekend, I got to the grocery store and was on the verge of a panic attack. I said to myself, “What the Fuck?!?!?”. I say in the car force few minutes and focused on my breathing. Then I reminded myself that I am a warrior and I’ve battled and conquered much more terrifying things then the grocery store. So I gave a silent battle cry and marched myself into the grocery store.

I am curious about where this grocery store anxiety has come from. I don’t remember any traumatic events in a grocery store. I wonder if it is about all of the food and the judgment I’ve endured all my life about the food I choose to eat. I wonder if it the sense of invisibility and being on display at the same time. I wonder what I don’t remember. I wonder if it has to do with the fear when I was a child that my mother would leave somewhere and forget me. I wonder why that anxiety chose to show up again after so long.

My mission statement

I’ve been participating in a Peace and Presence group at Church, run by my priest, Mary. We were a group of 7 adults who met 7 times throughout 3 months. We were very supportive of each other and did various activities to get to know ourselves better. Knowing yourself is a great way to be at peace with who you are and to be able to be more present to those around you.

Our last assignment was to write a mission statement for ourselves. This is mine:
Patty’s Mission Statement

7/8/2019

My mission in life is to be thankful for and a good steward

of the awesome universe and

amazing body that God

has given me to live in.

thankful for and a good steward

of the awesome universe and

amazing body that God

has given me to live in.

My mission is to live my life to its fullest,

understanding that it

is a journey with ups and

downs. I will celebrate my

journey and the people who

walk with me. I will work

on healing myself as

that healing will be healing

for the world.

my life to its fullest,

understanding that it

is a journey with ups and

downs. I will celebrate my

journey and the people who

walk with me. I will work

on healing myself as

that healing will be healing

for the world.

My mission in life is to live as mindfully and in the

present as possible,

so that I may hear God

calling and my heart and

soul responding.

as mindfully and in the

present as possible,

so that I may hear God

calling and my heart and

soul responding.

My mission is to use my compassion, resilience, and

humor to love and help

people in my life to heal

and grow.

compassion, resilience, and

humor to love and help

people in my life to heal

and grow.

And, finally, my mission in life is to tell the stories of

my triumphs and struggles

so that they may be an

instruction manual to those

facing similar challenges

on their own journeys.

is to tell the stories of

my triumphs and struggles

so that they may be an

instruction manual to those

facing similar challenges

on their own journeys.

Copyrighted 7/8/2019

A couple of the steps that I want to take to follow my mission are to become a Reiki healer and to write a book about my life and how I came out whole.

Me

I’ve been a Warrior for years.

I am still a Warrior

And that will never change.

But, I am also becoming

And transforming.

I am Becoming

Me.

I am Transforming

Into a woman

Who is found, rather than lost

And healed rather than broken and damaged.

The journey has been

Long and hard.

I’ve climbed mountains

And fallen of cliffs.

I’ve felt as if I would drown

In a sea of emotions

Or spontaneously combust.

And yet,

I’ve risen like a phoenix

From the ashes.

I am a Warrior Queen.

I am the Woman I’ve been becoming.

I am the little girl risen.

I am a Mother and a Healer.

I am Who I always longed for.

I am Me.

Patty

Copyrighted 6/26/2019

The Wild Woman rises like a Phoenix from the ashes of her life, to become the heroine of her own LEGEND... -Shikoba- WILD WOMAN SISTERHOOD™ #wildwomen #rewild #wildwomanmedicine #phoenix #shikoba #shikibaquotes #wildwomansisterhoodSome women are lost in the fire - I Love My LSI