I’m realizing that lots of times, it’s been me that gets hurt when I don’t know the rules. I didn’t know the rules sbout how to be sa kid in my family.  And right now, I apparently don’t know  the ruled of many friendships.  I guess that if my family were a real family and my friends were real friends, they would make sure I knew the rules.  In fact,  I’m wondering if there should even be rules.  I only have one rule with my friends, “please do not hurt me intentionally”.  However, apparently, supposed friendships can have many kther rules.  And then, i start to wonder, are those people really my friends?


One thought on “Rules

  1. I really hate it when you get punished for rules you never knew were there, and as I’m finally learning to explicitly ask for what I need and set limits I am growing less and less tolerant of people who don’t do the same. I think you’re right, the only real rule should be not to deliberately hurt people. I find that one of the hardest things about this process is dealing with relationships (both friends and family) that haven’t kept pace with my own growth. Sometimes I do decide that those people aren’t really my friends any more – and if I dig deeper, maybe they never were. I was just someone who met their needs and it wasn’t truly reciprocal. It can be very lonely when you realise how few genuine friendships you have, but better in the long run to focus your efforts on the ones that are truly about sharing. I wish you all the best in dealing with this.

    Liked by 1 person

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